Half Moon?

What's On the Menu

If you have talked to me at any time during the past month, then I have little doubt I didn't talk to you about Cooper's eating and weight. When we went to the doctor for his 6 month check up, he had not even gained two pounds in two months and was only in the 25th percentile for his weight (40th for height). The pediatrician wasn't concerned at all (Cooper doesn't exactly look underfed), but I started obsessing! He hadn't been nursing very well for a few days before that, and it was clear he was headed for another nursing strike. I had decided I wasn't going to battle out another strike and would start giving him formula. I started giving him bottles that were half formula/half pumped breastmilk. Well, long story short, I am lucky if I can get Cooper to take a 6 oz bottle-most of the time he drinks about 4 oz. He also isn't eating a whole lot of baby food or oatmeal cereal. So, the more moms I talked to, the more I obsessed about how little he was eating. I kept thinking that maybe he wasn't eating as much because of all the changes in his diet that took place in a short period of time. After a month of no improvement though, I was ready to panic! I gave in and called the doctor's office. The nurse said as long as he's gaining weight and happy, no worries-he'll eat as much as he wants/needs. I took him the next day for his flu shot and asked them to weigh him. He had gained weight, and the nurse reiterated the "no worries-he's fine" conversation I had with another nurse the day before.

Anyway, I say all that to say this: I know a typical day of eating for Cooper might look like it's not enough, but it's all I can get in him, and I wanted to document this so when he's consuming our entire refrigerator's contents on a daily basis as a teenager I can look back and laugh at myself for being upset now about him not eating enough! I'm still a little self conscious about it though, so for Karl's sake and sanity, don't leave a comment telling me it looks like he's not getting enough to eat or anything along those lines. The nurse said he's fine, so he's fine (so why am I still obsessing?!).

Breakfast:

bottle (4 oz of formula, 2 oz of breastmilk)

2 T oatmeal cereal (mixed with leftover milk from bottle or new pumped breastmilk)

1/2 jar of Stage 1 Fruit

Lunch:

bottle (same as earlier)

1/2 jar of Stage 1 Fruit

1/2 jar of Stage 1 Vegetable

(I stir any leftover milk from his bottle into the baby food to help make sure he gets enough liquids)

Snack:

bottle (same)

Dinner:

bottle (same)

2 T oatmeal or rice cereal (mixed with leftover milk from bottle or new pumped breastmilk)

1/2-1 jar of Stage 1 Vegetable (sometimes 1/2 of 2 jars of different foods)

*I do combine the prepared oatmeal or rice cereal with whatever baby food he's eating so we're not sitting there forever.

Middle of the Night Feeding around 4:00 a.m. (He nurses for this feeding)

Cooper seems to love the fruits and tolerates a couple of the vegetables while hating the other vegetables. It's really funny because if he likes it, that mouth opens up wide so fast and he makes "mmmm" sounds, but if he doesn't like it, as soon as the food hits his taste buds, he closes he eyes, purses his lips, and shakes his head. He also tries to grab the spoon from me to keep it from getting close to his mouth again. Hilarious!

Here is my guess on how he would rank the foods from his most favorite to least favorite:

1. Bananas

2. Apples

3. Pears

4. Peaches

5. Sweet Potatoes

6. Carrots

7. Green Beans

8. Squash

9. Peas (hates peas just like his mama)

Even though he doesn't eat as much as he's "supposed to", there are times when I just can't get the food to him fast enough. That's when he resorts to drastic measures...

like eating his fingers...

or his foot...

or even both feet...

7 Month Photo Shoot

"Hey Mom. Whatcha doin' with that camera?"

"It's time for another photo shoot?! Where does time go?!"

"Okay, Eli, listen up. If we're going to do this every month you can't keep making me look bad by sitting there so nicely. You gotta move around and look away from the camera like I do."

"Don't interrupt me, Eli. I'm talking."

"See. I'm not looking at the camera. It's driving Mom nuts!"

"Are you looking away from the camera, Eli? Now start moving around."

"Mmmooomm! We were just starting to have fun!"

A Moment of Honesty

Sometimes I like to read through my blog past. I'm glad I started this blog when I did, and I'm thankful to be reminded of the emotions and feelings and experiences that have gotten us to where we are. Writing on here in the beginning was my outlet during a very trying time. I kept this blog as my little secret for a couple months even. I was embarrassed and a little ashamed to share it. It bore details of a personal nature; details I couldn't bring myself to verbalize without always--and even sometimes unknowingly--crying. As time went on though, I did share it because it became an "easy" way of letting people know what we were going through. Once I got pregnant, this blog took a turn though, and I don't really like where it's gone. It became just another blog. It became filled with pregnancy updates and then pictures and little stories of our baby; fun, lighthearted stuff mostly. It started to lack heart, and more importantly, it started to lack honesty. A fear of being judged snuck in where the honesty had been. I began writing what I thought others would want to read and not what was in my heart. As a Southern girl, I felt like it had to be "pretty". Revealing my fears, mistakes, and uncertainties was not appropriate. I had what I wanted, so everything needed to be nice and rosy, and deep down inside, I was terrified of someone thinking I was doing something wrong as a mom. I no longer documented the feelings of a mother-to-be or a new mother trudging through new, exciting, and often unnerving territory because of a fear that what I was feeling wasn't "normal" or what I was doing wasn't "right". If I have learned one thing as a mom, it's that there is no "normal" or "right"! However, I can't help but believe others, especially those who are honest with themselves, feel that way too. During a parent-teacher conference once, I had a mom, with tears in her eyes, say that hardest thing about being a mom/parent is that you never know if you're truly doing the right thing for your child. You do the best you can, but by the time you know if you did good, they're grown, and you're past the point of being able to do it again, better if needed. I thought at the time that I understood what she was saying, but I didn't truly understand until I had Cooper. I have repeated similar versions of what she said countless times in the past 7 months. With every decision and ever action comes a little voice questioning myself. Is letting him cry it out really best? Should I go rock him back to sleep? Do I give him Tylenol for this? Do I feed him more/less? Etc. There is a lot of doubt in parenting, at least for me there is. A friend who went through infertility before getting pregnant with both of her children eased the frustration I feel with this doubt with something she said. She said that we (moms who went through infertility) put so much pressure on ourselves to do everything just right. We fought so hard and desired our children so much, so we tend to think it's not okay for us to make a mistake, and any negative feelings we might have towards our new role are shockingly horrible for us to feel. For so long, I dreamed of how life would be when we finally had a baby, and when those dreams were not the reality, I was confused, frustrated, and maybe even a little mad about it. Sleepless nights (and days), finicky eating habits, breastfeeding difficulties, crying, sickness--those were not part of the "normal" I had envisioned. Motherhood has been the most amazing, incredible, life changing, challenging, and special thing I have ever been a part of, and I am grateful for every second of it. We have wonderful moments and we have horrible moments in this household. We laugh and we cry. We are learning. I want to once again document the honesty of our lives, as raw and ugly as they might be at times, but also as beautiful and strong as they are too. So judge as you will. But I hope somewhere in my words you find a little piece of yourself, or if nothing else, I hope you feel better about your own parenting skills after reading!

Dear Tooth Fairy: Start Saving Up

Cooper on the day he cut his first tooth

Dear Miss Tooth Fairy,

This letter is to inform you that you have a future client. On Saturday, March 12, 2011, Cooper cut his first tooth. It was first discovered at Fire House Subs as our family was eating lunch. According to my husband, I caused quite a scene when I found the tooth. We were very excited, as we have been waiting on this tooth since Cooper was 3 months old and we first began claiming he was getting ready to teethe. This is the first of many teeth to come, and Cooper will be willing to begin trading his teeth for an unspecified amount of money in approximately 5-6 years when they fall out and are replaced by new and bigger ones. We promise to take good care of his teeth until that time comes. We look forward to doing business with you in the future!

Sincerely,

Coop's Mama

Piggies

Recently Little Man discovered his feet. He seems to love them as much as I do, and I have to say, I am a little thankful that he's playing with them now instead of the other thing he discovered a while back and liked to play with during diaper changing and bathing. :)

The First Bug

Yesterday afternoon Cooper was taking a nap, and I heard him start to stir and cough a little. I went in and checked on him and in the dimness saw that he had spit up a little on his sleep sack. I decided to let him be because he had settled back into a nice sleep. About 5 minutes later, I heard him fuss and then cough again and fuss some more. I went in to get him, and the poor little guy had not spit up; he had thrown up. Apparently he wasn't coughing, he was gagging. His crib was a mess, as were his pajamas, sleep sack, arms, face, paci, everything. As I started trying to change his clothes, he looked up at me with the saddest and most scared eyes and then his whole little body started shaking. My heart ached, and it was all I could do to not start crying at that moment. I got him in the bath as Karl changed his sheets. He seemed okay (not himself though) until I got him out of the tub, and then he got sick again. And again. And again. It happened seven times in a little over an hour. After time #3, I called the pediatrician's office and left a message for the on-call nurse to call me back. I also had Karl pack a bag because I was ready to book it to the emergency room (note to readers: I do NOT handle sickness well. I get really scared really fast about anything out of the ordinary. Anyone remember when I had pink eye several years ago, and I feared it would leave me blind? Or when I had my first ear infection in middle school and didn't tell my parents because I was sure I had a brain tumor? Or when I had poison sumac and thought it was leprosy? I could go on, but I think I've made my point :)). As I waited for the nurse to return my call, I just rocked Little Man, and he fell asleep in my arms. This never happens, which just made me all the more scared. The nurse said we didn't need to go to the ER, told us there's a stomach bug going around, and directed us newbie-parents on what to do. After that one hour passed, Coop didn't get sick again, and when he woke up at 11:00 p.m. and was wanting to eat and only got some Pedialyte, he was not very happy. I slept in the chair in his room so I could be there if he got sick again or just needed to be cuddled. It was nice because I was able to check on him as many times as I wanted last night without having to walk down the hall. Other than being a little tired today, he's been just fine-thankfully.

Before Cooper got sick yesterday, he was crying when I put him down in his crib for his nap. I had decided to let him cry for a little bit, as he normally falls asleep fairly quickly. Nevertheless, it's hard to listen to even though I know he's fine and needs to learn to fall asleep unassisted. I told Karl that the most joyful sound I've ever heard is our little one's laugh, and the most heartbreaking is his cry. You truly do feel their joy and their pain. Last night was a hard example of that.

The Paci

Oh, the paci. In the early days, Cooper wouldn't take a paci, but as the months passed by, he realized that they're not that bad. Now, he actually prefers to have one...or two...or even three. I have moments when I hate myself for pushing the paci (like when he didn't know how to put it in yet and was waking up every hour during the night fussing for it and when we're at the grocery store and I realize I left it in the car and Little Man is upset about it). However, the paci has provided us many laughs lately, and it appears Little Man has learned a lot of lessons from it, such as...

Although they're all made for the same thing, every paci is different. Very different.

And it's very important to have a variety because you never know what you might want from minute to the next.

(Mama note: This is how Cooper prefers to put his paci in. He plays with it, turns it so the sucky part is sticking up and then lowers himself on to it. Very clever, very complicated)

And you have to hold on to all your special belongings because someone (i.e. Sadie) might take it (i.e. chew it up) when you're not paying attention.

This is very important: Lesson #3 applies even in your sleep.

(Mama note: Cooper holds his paci in while he sleeps, and my favorite is when he is on his back, and he holds it in with one finger. It is hilarious, but I haven't been able to get a picture yet!)